The Message:

“NOTHING LESS.”

Looking like a Lady.

 I wonder if Lady Gaga ever misses wearing normal clothes? That somewhere deep inside her, a voice is desperately begging to let herself just wear dirty trackies, a worn out jumper and a pair of thongs. It just seems like walking around in clothes (or lack thereof) from outer space can get a bit uncomfortable and heavy, you know? Here Lady Gaga, look at this happy chap, with a flannel jacket, a shirt specifically advertising the kind of alcohol you’d like to drown in, and a cold one in your right hand, doesn’t this look fun?  

“Yiih mate, been wanting to do this aye? Grab meself some coldies and just hang with the lads aye?”

 

 But I don’t know, that’s just me. That’s probably why I’m here at home wearing my oldest pants (with a hole on them) and not winning Grammies and raking in the money. It’s all good.

(Note: Fact number 1: I actually enjoy looking at Lady Gaga’s fashion; number 2: I’m bored. And I don’t endorse alcohol. haha! )

To be set apart

A shout out to Miss MARY MAGTIBAY! woot! Great word tonight, you always manage to cut to the chase and get right down to it. =D I’m invigorated.

And with my last post, which was funnily enough quite related to what she shared, it reassured me yes, there are things to be done.

 *sigh been staring at this screen for a while now. I should go to sleep.*

Break me.

Ok so this is a declaration. One that’s waaaaay long overdue.

ABBIE CASIN:

 

LET GO

of EMOTIONS that are unnecessary: bitterness, resentment, fear.

LET GO

of PEOPLE who are not pushing you forward towards God.

LET GO

of every unfruitful thing that takes up space in your heart.

 

I want to be remembered as someone who pushed for more.

It’s not that I’m not grateful; I’ll gladly acknowlege and accept my blessings.

But I will NOT be the person who settled for anything less.

When God was creating me…

…He was probably crying.

That’s the thought that came into my head one morning, followed by a conversation that was conjured up in my head between God and one of his accomplices, let’s say an angel called…Bob (yeah, creative right?). So through this randomness that I have, which I’ve already accepted as a gift from God, I will strive to know how much he loves me and to be enveloped in that love.

Setting: God’s workshop, on the day slash time slash moment he was creating Abbie.

Angel Bob:

Oh Holy One, what doest thou?

God:

Bob, seriously, we’re having this conversation IN Abbie’s head. You know she can’t keep up with your Shakepearean references.

Angel Bob:

OK, cool. I was getting slightly worried as well.

So, what are you doing? (looks over) Oh. Are you going to create her?

God:

Yeah. Don’t you think she’ll be wonderful and great?! Here, look at the plans I’ve got for her. (hands over the blueprint)

Angel Bob: (looks at the blueprint)

Uhh…God. Are you sure about this? I don’t know…this bit here, look, it’s a bit shakey and inconsistent. You sure you want to do that?

God:

Of course! Remember that time when there was NOTHING? There was just darkness? And then I created the universe, the stars, the sun; and then the birds, the mammals, the sea and everything else in it? Remember how grand that was? Well those are all for her.

I want to do this, I exist for her.

Angel Bob: (stares at God)

Even though the place you’re going to put her in is surrounded by evil and temptations? Even though you know that the pain and disappointment that will be inflicted on her will almost certainly cost your intimacy with her? You like creating beautiful things don’t you? Why don’t you just create another lovely peacock or something better? Won’t she just make you cry? Look at those tears now, I can hear your heart breaking already.

Is it worth it?

God:

You’re right Bob, I do love creating beautiful and majestic things. And that’s exactly the reason why I’m creating her. I can always create something better, but right now, I’m forming the best. Don’t worry, she’s not complete yet. Yes, I know of the risks, I know of her downfalls and yes, I know that she’ll turn away from me at some point.

But I want her to choose me.

(a smile starts to form, eyes show excitement) And when she does find me, when she starts longing for me the same way I long for her right at this very second, then I shall RESTORE her. To restore her and complete her in my love, wouldn’t that be BEAUTIFUL?

So yes. It is worth it.

Learning Law

“Lack of creditworthiness is an instance of inability.”

And so I stopped reading my book on International Trade Law (yeah, I know…). Why did I stop? I am 2 weeks behind my readings, I have an essay due in a few days. I just wanted to bloody finish this chapter, which has already taken me 3 days to read.

But something in me needed to reflect on that sentence. Ok, background on what I was reading: Basically it’s about the legal contracts that govern the actions between a buyer and seller in different countries (at least that’s what I think it’s saying haha). Anyway, so I was on a roll, had only a few pages left and was on that part where it explains what happens when a party is anticipated not to perform its obligations under a contract. Then I got to that sentence:

“Lack of creditworthiness is an instance of inability.”

I had to look this up. What does it mean to be creditworthy? I’m not an entrepreneur but I think in business terms it means a person’s or a company’s ability to meet their debt obligations.

When I became a Christian, I entered an agreement with God; he will do things for me and I will have to do things for him. To liken with the Parable of the Bags of Gold in Matthew 25, the servants came into an agreement with the master when he asked of them to take care of his wealth while he was away. To each of the servants, bags of gold were entrusted according to one’s ability. As the story goes, two of the servants put the money to work and gained more than the original amount and when the master returned, he commended their works and were given MORE. Creditworthiness here, then, thus mean the measure of our credibility to meet our obligations.

So when I entered this “contract” with God, suddenly I was given an obligation to use what was entrusted in me and make it fruitful. And if I carry out this task well, I will be “put in charge of many things” and “share my master’s happiness.” That’s the agreement. Carry out my task excellently, and I will be in charge of more. More? You mean I have to work so I could work some more?

John Eldredge commented, my boys do not do their chores so that in the end they could clean the whole house. They do their chores so that they could do what they love doing after. If I then become fruitful with my obligations, it is agreed upon that I will spend an eternity of joy with God. To share his happiness. And it’s not difficult to know what he delights in. He asked Job, “Prepare to answer me. Have you given orders to the morning? Do you know where light and darkness reside? Do lightning bolts report to you? Can you count the stars?” And on and on he went boasting with pride in taking care of his creations. Now, imagine what honour it would be to be able to share that job with him.

In my book, it goes on to explain that if a party is deemed incapable of performing his obligations, the contract will fundamentally be breached or cut off. On the grounds of anticipation of a non-performance, it will constitute by itself an anticipated fundamental breach, that is, if the party is showing signs that it is not creditworthy, then it is enough to say that it is unable to complete its obligations. If it is unable to complete the obligation under the contract, then the contract is fundamentally breached, severed, broken.

What happened with the third servant in the parable? Because he didn’t do anything with the bag of gold he had, and instead gave back to his master the SAME amount he was entrusted with initially, he was called worthless and was thrown out. John 15:2 points out, “He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful.” It’s part of the agreement I have with God; to be ABLE to share the happiness of being in charge of what he is in charge of in eternity, I need to show that I am CREDIBLE to make fruitful the gifts and capacities I was endowed with. I’m not saying I need to prove myself worthy, that somehow I need to gain his love and his trust. Love is given freely and unconditionally by him. And because of that love, he has faith.

I was made in the likeness of God, I was created with the same capacity. I was created to take my place next to him sharing his happiness. But if I just let my talents waste away here, if I never got to know that the bag of gold I have could become FIVE BAGS of gold, would I be able to know what I could add to the splendour of God? Otherwise, my lack of creditworthiness would anticipate my inability and will thus lead to the termination of the contract.

“His plan is for us to develop, as apprentices to Jesus, to the point where we can take our place in the ongoing creativity of the universe.”

Question is, are you ready for that kind of influence?

To wake his love with love’s first kiss, and prove that true love conquers all.

Awaken Sleeping Beauty, let me wipe away those tears.

I shall comfort your weary heart, the one filled with fears.

You’ve been numb and broken,

Real beauty’s swept aside

But don’t you know I chose you, you’re my Princess, you’re my Bride?

 

 I know your past is riddled with agony and pain,

An intricate jar that’s been broken, time and time again.

And with this harsh reality, your life has put you through,

I heard your screams of “I give up!” and

from my presence, you withdrew.

 

I saw you give away yourself to deceitfulness and lies,

The value I’ve bestowed in you were entrusted to blind eyes.

Didn’t you hear me mourn, the cries of my broken heart?

I cannot bear, from you, to be apart.

 

Now let me take you back into my arms where you belong,

Let me make you whole again because in your weakness, I am strong.

I’ll lift up the veil from your eyes to reveal my glory and my pride,

Because since the moment I have thought of you, you’ve been my Princess, my Bride.

 

Dedicated to the King who searched for me

when I was lost.

You found me.